Thursday, August 5, 2010

Adoption talks with a 3 year old...

Haven't blogged in a LONG time.  Someone suggested I start again, so here goes....

We are in the final stages of the adoption process for Prince B and Little Miss Ruffle Bottom.  One of the millions of things that needs to be done (required by the State) is to have 3 "adoption talks" with the kids.  B is 3.  LMRB is almost 1 1/2.  But because they can talk, they have to give their permission to be adopted.  WHATEVERRRRR.

So today was our first "talk".  We had two Caseworkers come out, to talk to the kids in private, to make sure they want to be adopted.  I can't prepare the kids for the talks, that would make too much sense.  Or coersion.  Again, whateverrrrr.  I don't know how these things NORMALLY go, but I'm pretty sure this wasn't what they had in mind.

So the two Caseworkers (whom both visit us each month) take the kids in B's room to "talk".  The door shuts.  I eat my breakfast and finish my coffee (it is almost 11 at this point).  I really don't know what to do with myself.  Quiet.  Peace.  Noone to chase after.  Not my norm!  But that didn't last long..... 

B starts yelling, he is putting the Caseworkers in time-out.  He is mean.  He is bossy.  He is acting like a MEAN, IRATE Teacher.  He is putting LMRB in time-out (she has NEVER been in time-out).  I can't do anything about it, so I just sat there and prayed.

B has been in five homes in his 3 years of life.  Kids in foster care KNOW Caseworkers, they KNOW change.  And being alone with these two sweet women FREAKED him out!  I can't even imagine what went through this poor little boys mind!  It hurts my heart, it really does, to think of how scared he was.

So they are in there for about 30 minutes.  I can hear them trying to re-direct him to serious conversation.  It obviously isn't working.  They come out.... frazzled and overwhelmed.  B is FREAKED out.  He runs to me, jumps in my lap, and buries his head in my chest.  This little guy was scared. 

So, "talk one" is over with. 

On a good note, they said that he KNOWS this is HOME.  That he KNOWS we are MOM AND DAD.  "In his mind, we are his family, this is his home and that is good". 

We have two more talks to go.  I am praying they go better than this first one did....


  1. Poor B! I can't believe they would do that! I just don't understand the logic at all. I hope the next two go better, poor baby!

  2. That poor sweet boy! I hate this for him :(